I am a house of a million halls, each sworn to one obsession. Gatekeepers wield no gavels, only arrows of judgement. Your worth is measured oddly, rising, falling, always changing. Some days bring cake for birthdays none can see yet all can share.

i can shave every day but my beard will stay the same. what am i?

The largest number no one can describe so short as this, the barber who shaves only those who don’t shave their own tress, Does the list of every list without itself, itself say? Let me warn you that I’m a Cretan, always lying anyway.

I’m slippery, I’m slimy, I can make things less difficult, after all it’s in my name. Oh yeah, I’m also a musical.

I judge your wallet and your art; I ticket sins then say I’m smart. What am I?