I can't catch a break. Nobody likes me, even people who like the color blue. Even when I was Great, people hated me. People are constantly pushing me down - so to speak - and ignoring me, though I never let them forget that I'm always here, waiting to remind them of their failures. Probably the only people in the world that benefit from me are pharmaceutical companies and therapists. FML.

What do you call a bear with absolutely no teeth?

When you're with me, I've always got that wet hairstyle. I glide across the floor, my movements clean and directed. After we're done the space is wet for awhile. And with a thorough wringing I am subjected.

I turn the rational into the insane, for reasons inane. If you don't keep me in check, your relationship I will wreck. Known as the monster with eyes of green, the only emotion I bring is suffering.

I have three feet, but no arms and no legs. What am I?