Why did the duck lose his doctor license? Because he is a...

You can do it in the tub or a pool. You'll need to be close to some water. Look for dry people, then smack the water to get them wet! Drive over that huge puddle and soak those people walking by. I follow splish. Cannonball! What am I ?

A legend or key is usually needed for me, while an unflowered rose may join as well. I shrink things for scale, sometimes I have coordinates, other times a grid. I can hold the world and all its features, while depth and height hide between my lines.

Three golf clubs walk into a bar. The putter orders a beer, and the pitching wedge orders a gin and tonic. The bartender asks the third one if he wants anything. The golf club replies: NO THANKS, ...

After scientific studies worldwide, all balloons responded unanimously. Which type of music scares them most.