I come before events unfold, An omen in the air. I whisper hints of things untold, Foreshadowing despair.

I am the pig of the evergreens. I advise against petting me.

I can cause a disappearance, but I cannot stay on top. People use me to wash.

I irritate most twice every day, but a criminal is elated when I work his grammar once.

I am on a chair. I am on a table. Sometimes I’m a bit unsteady. Toddlers practice to use me.