I’m given before I’m earned, yet sometimes change after I’m grown. I can vanish from memory, but still follow you everywhere. What am I?

Note - The solution is missing al at the end because it too long. A major anniversary this summer, though my European friends likely are not impressed and my Asian friends likely think, that’s all?

I live just above and just below the surface of the ocean or sea. Add ER to my end and I become nineteen-fifty’s slang for the God-given herb.

Whether on your feet or a bridge, this shape provides support and strength

I’m raised without hands, carried without feet. You’ll find me in structures both ancient and modern, yet I leave no mark behind. I can be a simple melody or layered with harmonies. I’m chosen specifically for important milestones or Ordinary days. Remove the focus on Him, and I cease to be me.