I am a record of the present that becomes a relic by dusk. I possess many columns but support no roof. I am covered in ink, yet I have never written a word of my own. I offer you the world in folded sheets, and you use me to set that world on fire?

If you drop me I’m sure to crack, but give me a grin and I’ll always grin back.

My purpose in this world is to prevent murder using fear tactics. Day and sleepless night I keep unwavering, unseeing watch. I don't move a muscle nor do I say anything even if I do see something - I simply let my daunting form do the speaking. This is a good thing, though, because if I could move, I would frighten more than just my intended audience.

Metallic twins that dance in bowls, stirring chaos or calm, they cradle warmth and clink in celebration, never solo in the cutlery drawer.

obtuse, rubber goose, green moose, guava juice giant snake, birthday cake, large fries, chocolate shake