If it were alive, it would probably say ‘Dear god! Please not again Mr. VP! Noooo!!!’

A little groove, a mark so sly, on belts it whispers by and by. When you score, it's time for a treat, just like a mark on your seat.

Found on dragons, lizards, and the like, I fend off blades and arrows with ease. If you find me in a loo, step on my and cry out geez!

I’m a simple thing, yet strength I lend, With little effort, great force I send. Push me down or pull me near, I make heavy work seem less severe.

Built of gold along the shore, I rule a kingdom until four. With towers tall and moats so wide, I fall before the rising tide.