Take all of your fingers, And all of your toes, Weave them together, And count with your nose

'Twas the morn after turkey. In front of the shops the glass door was creaking, it was going to pop. The customers hung right outside in the lot, piled up to the door to see what could be bought. Unlocking doors and trying not to fall, retailers backed up as hordes flooded the mall. Outside: a noise, such a cacophonous clatter. Dad vaulted the roof by using a ladder! He looked like he hadn't slept for some days. 'FOR CHRISTMAS!!!' he yelled, eyes going two sep'rate ways. A fever dream... For some a living. What am I? One day past Thanksgiving.

I'm old but still have shape. I can go down the stairs albeit I might be late. Gravity is my friend but I'm no physicist. I can't stand the fidget, this I tell my therapist. I know gravity very well. Gone are the days I reigned at show-and-tell.

I live in a bridge and I downvote your posts, I'm just here to argue and gobble up goats. And I'm all outta goats...

Fly me to the moon, or Make me out of a bottle of soda and some mentos. Either way I fly into the sky at high speed.